Until Next Time,
xx BAS
PS - Just survived the housing lottery - I got a great room in the North of campus which is the location I wanted…yippee!! :D
P S S - paper due Friday paper due Friday AYEEEE YAIIIII.
Today at 7:30AM -butwhyyyyyy!?- I had course registration online. I signed up for Pilates (gotta' keep them glutes and thighs toned, hahaha!!) Writing the Short Story, The Rise of the Novel, African Novels, and History of Ancient Philosophy (I needed to fulfill my philosophy/religion requirement). I KNOW I KNOW I DIDN'T SIGN UP FOR ITALIAN but here's why: all of the memorizing and pressure to speak in an authentic accent (this would be the intermediate level course, after all) would just really cause me anxiety and unnecessary stress. Instead, I'll do vocabulary cards in my spare time. But actually, though, because I'd love to travel to Italy for a week or so in the future. I'm actually really excited about philosophy because I've never taken a course in the subject area before and I'd love to expand my mental horizons *flexes brain to show off mighty strength skillz*! I'm glad I'm taking the Ancient course, rather than the Intro course because the Intro is super basic and covers topics such as what are basic philosophical questions. Now, if you know me, you'll know that my whole life is spent in philosophic rumination. So I think Ancient (which focuses on Socrates, Aristotle, and my homeboy Plato -aka the only philosopher I've ever read a book by-) rather than questions I already ask on a daily basis will be a way better fit for me! I had a heart-to-heart with my American Earth professor today, and we talked all about what it's like to become a professor… except that we totally went over past office hours and I missed my appointment with my other English professor whom I was going to ask a few questions about my paper due this Friday for my Theory and Practice of Literary Study class *sigh*. But the ironic thing was, my American Earth teacher gave me incredible advice for the paper, anyhow, and it was really refreshing to get a different perspective on the assignment, yet still from a highly credible source. I realize now how important writing on this blog is to me, and I KNOW I KNOW EVERY TIME I WRITE ANOTHER POST I SAY THIS but I honestly really really want to write everyday. It's been difficult for me these past few days (hence the earlier post today thanking Reese's for making me feel a bit little less….. aksfl;asdfkas-ish. hahhah) On another unrelated note, because I really would like to change the topic here, I stopped to admire the snow on the ground - yes, snow on the ground on April 16th!! It was a lovely contrast, the juxtaposition of the fuchsia-pink blooms on the trees and the icy white blanket (which is ironic all in itself… aren't blankets supposed to make people warmer, not colder?!). Life is so beautiful and it's important to remember that, even when you're hurting. It's all the little things in life that make it so incredibly fantastic, and I think people should remind themselves of this once in a while - I know I sure need to start doing this more often!
Until Next Time, xx BAS PS - Just survived the housing lottery - I got a great room in the North of campus which is the location I wanted…yippee!! :D P S S - paper due Friday paper due Friday AYEEEE YAIIIII.
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Dear Reese's,
You never fail to help heal a hurting heart, especially right now when I need you most. This is all I'm going to say. Your most devoted fan, Brooke I'll write another post later this evening (if time permits) apologizing for not having posted in 2038420384 days but for now I realized that when you're feeling so very overwhelmed it's either too much espresso in that iced decaf caramel macchiato w/ skim milk of yours (guilty as charged… *shrugs shamelessly*) or it's because you have difficulty saying NO!!!!!!!!!!!
I quit modeling in my college's fashion show at the annual multicultural dance performance. I chose attending a Passover seder over speaking in a panel of faculty and students about how gender is portrayed at my college. I quit my college's chapter of HerCampus, and acting as content manager for it. I decided not to apply for a position advocating for sexual assault prevention and awareness on my college's campus because I would truly not have time for it. I told Prince Harry that I need a little more time studying Italian (and therefore cannot hang out as much during the week) and he understood that I wasn't using it as some excuse not to hang out -- I literally just want to spend some more time on my classes because I honestly feel like I haven't been getting as much out of them as I could and want to spend some more time on studying. I decided not to join the spoken word club at my college until the Fall because I just don't have time. But rather than focusing on all that I'm "giving up", I'd like to focus on what I've gained by all of this "quitting"… I was able to apply for a job as Floor Model at my local Hollister Co. outlet (I hear back this week… *fingers crossed!*). I was able to take a few minutes and just sing along to "Find You (Acoustic Version-Live in Los Angeles)" by Zedd and "Explosions" by Ellie Goulding. That version is my absolute favorite of "Find You" and I highly recommend it; it really makes me want to do ballet!! I was made co-blogmaster for my college's fashion magazine's blog (I write the column Must-Have Mondays). I held a successful letter-writing event for Love Your Melon which I am now my college's campus ambassador for (www.loveyourmelon.com). I will definitely write more in depth about the event and the Love Your Melon organization in general, later. I've been learning and struggling and floating and sinking and breathing deeply this past week, but I think sometimes you need a really stressful week to help you reach a better place. To help you feel more at peace with yourself. When you lose touch with yourself, sometimes you need to worst of days to remind yourself that you can get through anything. Or, as my personal favorite quote, "If Britney can make it through 2007, you can survive this day." More Later, xx BAS It's about time I write another post!! I honestly am trying to write a post every day but it's been a super busy time (only one month of classes left…just until May 7! can you believe!?). The new theme is up; hope y'all like it! It's not too, too out there because I just wanted to start out making only subtle changes at first, maybe some bigger ones later on. I'm lovin' the color purple, and the new head logo seems a bit edgier, like spray paint on bricks *flips hat backwards and throws deuces like a blogging champion*.
Speaking of the word "lovin'", as campus brand ambassador for Love Your Melon (www.loveyourmelon.com), I will be heading to the Yale-New Haven Smilow Pediatric Cancer Center and giving out hats to child cancer patients! For each Love Your Melon hat purchased, one is donated to a child cancer patient. This Friday in my dorm's common room, I created a letter-writing event where students at my college can come and write letters to the patients with kind words and with things that will make them happy. Prince Harry will be helping to host it with me and will be dressing up like Superman when I donate the hats (the theme is superheroes!); he will be taking pictures with the kids and signing autographs "from Superman" !! It seems like the perfect time to have such an event because my mother just finished her own chemotherapy treatment just last Thursday!! I love her so, so much and I'm so incredibly proud of her strength and courage as a human being. ~~Stop reading here if you fear hearing about natural, feminine bodily issues and scroll down to the next part of this post~~ Also (sorry if you're squeamish and/or a guy who gets scared of girly issues) my tummy is killin' me. Every month, Children's Liquid Advil becomes my new boyfriend and my heat pack becomes my new best gurlfrand. I really don't know why I get pains so severely, I think it's because I'm a bit protein deficient?? I've been working out more, but I really need to make sure my diet is more balanced (read: less sugar that isn't from fruit or other natural sources…no, in this case, chocolate does not count as a natural source). I've heard that yoga and/or meditation, taking short walks, warm showers, constant naps, and being… active ;) can help a lot. If any of you readers have suggestions PLEASE send me a message on the contact form on the "SAY HELLO!" page because every month I'm literally suffering :/ . Oh, and I don't want to take birth control pills, so that's not an option for me (even though many people do in fact use them for this purpose, it's just because I have a pill-swallowing phobia *sigh* gotta learn, gotta learn…and studies show there's a higher risk for breast cancer which clearly after what my mom has gone through I am in no desire to go through that !) ~~Continue reading here if you stopped reading the above part~~ Other than that, just a TON of work to get done. Not sure what classes to take next semester. Not sure what dorm to live in next semester. Must.Clean.Dorm.Room. The Spring weather is so close, I can feel it *sticks short-sleeve-clad arm into the breeze* ! My job interview for Hollister Co. outlet is on Friday, too - ahhh! I want the job so badly!! I would only be working weekends, so I can still have time for all of the other lovely things I want to spend my time with. I'll keep ya posted! Until Next Time, xx BAS Check back on Sunday, when reconstruction will be complete!! ;) Tried to use custom html… messed up.
This being said, the blog is going to be under construction. It needs a makeover, anyway! In fact, I may even be switching blog platforms. Until Next Time, xx BAS -->Scored a dream internship at Sotheby's International Realty. (!!!)
-->Turned down three job offers in the areas of social media and/or real estate. -->Landed an invitation to a group interview to become a Hollister Co. Model (which is really just a cashier/clothes-folder but let us be honest here…I much prefer the term "model" ;). ) -->Finally went to a restaurant with Prince Harry that we wanted to go to since the winter (it finally opened up for the Spring season!) We got charged for other people's food as well as our own. Grrrrrrrrrrr…Luckily they refunded us. There may or may not have been a $1 tip involved… We also did a "Challenge" level Sudoku puzzle…GET ON OUR LEVELLLLLLL *throws deuces like a champ* -->Finally went with my friend Austin who I'd been meaning to grab lunch with for a while to Panera! -->Decided what classes I will sign up for during course registration to take in the fall. -->Decided on an order of housing preferences for next year. #yay. But alas… gotta get back to homework. I've got an Italian test on Friday that I've got to do molto bene on, lest my grade will be less than a 93% (which means I'd have to take the final exam in May…eek!) Until Next Time, xx BAS Sorry, readers!! I've been super busy but don't you worry...soon I'll write a legitimate post explaining what I've been up to, as well as my latest thoughts & various ponderings!! Sometimes the best thing we can do is free our souls of our secrets.
Prince Harry and I are back together. We were both very vulnerable. He said really hurtful things because he thought I didn't truly love him, so he wanted to protect himself. Now this doesn't make what he said right,nor does it make my actions right. I was still scared by a past relationship so I was always really critical, nitpicky, accusatory, worrying, and anxious. I thought he didn't truly love me, either. Maybe I wasn't truly ready to let love in because I felt like I couldn't be loved. Yesterday I had the norovirus full-on; today I still have it but a little milder. Saturday was our 3 month anniversary, and I stayed over. Yesterday (Sunday) Prince Harry took such amazing care of me at his house, never once leaving my side unless to grab me more water or Ritz crackers. He only went downstairs to eat a quick dinner when I was fast asleep taking a nap. Now you may judge me, think I'm young, think I'm naive, but I think what Prince Harry was most mad at me about, even more than the way I was critical or easily disappointed or questioning his authenticity was that I wasn't letting him in. Well, now I am finally ready to let him in. I literally stared at a picture on my phone for two minutes of him in his kitchen from Saturday when we were baking s'mores cupcakes together, and just could not stop smiling at it! Rather than react to this "vulnerability" by picking a fight or doing something to push him away or telling myself that there's no way he could reciprocate these feelings, I sighed and felt content with the world. Sometimes, timing just isn't right and you have to wait until you grow and develop a little more, to see what life is like without a person, and then you realize how much better you would feel if they were by your side again. Because when it's a matter of putting your big girl pants on and acknowledging your vulnerability but trusting in the other person not to break you versus losing a person for good, you know what you've got to do - we both knew what we had to do. And that was to break free of our fears and anxieties that were turning us into cold people that we really aren't. His method of defense was offense, and in a way, so was mine. We now agreed to never again throw around harsh words, to always show and tell the other how much we love each other, and to always talk things out without anger or pre-conceived notions (like we think we already know the answer to the question/accusation we would make). I've decided to not post anymore blog posts about our relationship about the day-to-day happenings (sometimes you just need to figure things out on your own without the judgement of the public eye), but once in a while, maybe. It's better not to analyze so much, I think. So, readers and friends, you can judge me all you want, but I know in my heart I have made the right decision for me. Until Next Time, xx BAS |